As Don headed out last night for the first time at 10 or so for meds, I knew it was going to be a long night. However, knowing that up front and then actually living through it are generally two different things. Yes, we're experiencing one of the less joyous times in parenting and yet, I am discovering that it also provides lots of cuddle time that busy, curious, 'look out world, here I come' three year olds don't often stop for.
Laura is sick. Normally stuff like this happens. But when you've had the difficulties she's had, having the stomach flu can take on a whole new meaning. Especially when it is accompanied by a high fever and a rather listless child who refuses to eat much of anything. I know I can be aggressive in getting her the help she needs but I've discovered over time that if the Dr. I'm talking to seems concerned along with me, I really need to take things more seriously. Last night, the Dr. was concerned. This morning when they called me back to check on her I knew she was really concerned. It didn't do much for my psyche after having just a few hours of sleep.
So I figure that I can worry and stew, something I am pretty good at. However, my abilities don't even hold a candle to Don's. He's a pro. But he comes by it honestly so I take that in to consideration. :) Anyway, I can either wear myself out more thinking of all the negative things that, in reality, might happen to someone with a nissen, or I can work really hard at 'casting all my cares upon Him'. In the middle of the night it was more of a 'gee Lord, where the heck are you?' and 'why is she still awake with a fever and not sleeping peacefully with a normal temp?' thing, but in the early morning hours as I read some of the Word and prayed for a bit out of desperation, I realized that I needed to do more of the 'thank you anyway' type of thing. Whatever happens, the Lord created her little being. He loves her more than I ever will, as hard as that is to imagine, and he is in charge. Even of her fevered, upset little tummy.
In my muddled, sleep deprived mind, I will intentionally turn her back over to the Lord again and again today as I cuddle with her, praying over her, and hoping to get a few minutes of sleep along with her. I will be thankful that she is here, alive and having a normal illness. I will rejoice when she drinks something and relax before we've been through the 'take your medicine' battle, er, activity instead of after. I will listen to her cries that her tummy hurts and ask for wisdom in taking care of her. Because she is here. Because she is mine. Because she is a normal three year old.
Parenting definitely isn't for pansies...