In thinking about, and actually writing down, my goals for this year, many of them were centered around how I could be a better wife and mother. I even wrote a few down that had nothing whatsoever to do with parenting or being a good wife. Or so I thought. But as I began planning on how I could work towards and achieve my goals, I realized that most of them really crossed all categories because they make me a better person. Period. I am meeting all of my goals when I organize the house so that we live more simply. I am meeting all of my goals when I strive to bring more peace and gentleness in to the household. And indeed I am meeting all of my goals when I become healthier and lose weight.
Ah, weightloss. That elusive dream. Or is it? Who controls what size I am? In large part, (no pun intended!) I do. I choose what comes in to my house because I do most of the shopping. I choose what is on the menu because I do most of the cooking. I choose what I put in to my mouth because I control me. No one is bribing me to shove that cookie in my mouth. No one is encouraging me to eat six miniature chocolate bars instead of just one. No one else is telling me that one more small helping of mashed potatoes won't hurt. I do that myself. It is really my choice. So what am I going to choose? How can I be the best person I can be, serving the Lord, my husband and my family in the best way I know how? Certainly a slimmer, healthier me would go a long way in that direction, wouldn't it?
Last fall I started back to Weight Watchers. My Mom, one of my best friends and certainly a very strong role model in my life, strongly encouraged me to go. The words "you have to get healthier so I don't have to raise those kids without you" kept coming up in conversations so I figured I ought to pay attention. I've lost some weight and am happy with my progress but I wish it were more. Indeed, some of the weight I lose I find again. And then lose again. And then find it again. But overall, I'm headed down and feel like I'll stay there. Slow but steady wins the race. With determination, a greater understanding of what makes me tick, and the knowledge that serving the Lord is more important that any cookie will get me through.
And good snacks. Lots of good snacks. Kudos, Fiber One Bars, 100 calorie packs of anything good, gooey or chocolatey, Creamsavers, 94% fat free Kettle Korn Popcorn, Quakes, WW Frozen snacks, Klondike Ice Cream Sandwiches, Smoothies, individually wrapped chocolate, WW cakes even with stiff icing on top, wheat thins and light swiss cheese wedges, WW and other high fiber bagels, and low calorie, high fiber yogurt keep me going through thick and thin. Hopefully less thick and more thin as time goes on.
And encouragement. Mom and Don are always encouraging me. I so need that. The small victories, when shared with them, become bigger victories. It gives me strength and courage to say no to the next cookie. And then there are the unexpected ones, those that help you know you really are doing the right thing, for the right reasons, and that you will succeed. Times when your sister-in-law mentions that you are in jeans again that you haven't been able to wear for awhile. Or when the neighbor mentions that you are looking great and asks if you've done something with your hair because they can't quite figure it out. Or when your son looks up at you with those big, innocent eyes and says "Mom, you really are pretty today." Yes, encouragement will carry me through.
Yes, I am becoming a thinner, better wife and mother. And a healthier person overall. I'm learning how to make better choices, not only in food but in other areas of life, and I'm teaching my children now to make better choices, too. But overall I think I'm becoming a better person just because I set a goal and I'm working on it. No more dreaming, wondering or deciding. Just doing. It feels good.